She is the third of four children in a middle class family from a town in North Karnataka. She had a traditional South Indian middle class upbringing and was quite happy to let her parents choose her groom. She had no great expectations from life -all she wanted was a normal happy life. But for some people even that is too much to ask! On the evening of their marriage the groom helped himself to all her jewellery and gambled them away. What seemed like the beginning turned out to be the end. But that was a beginning in another way. The docile, protected girl decided to take control of her life. She refused to stay with him and returned to her parents' house.The father said there was no place for her in his house and she should return to her "lawful" husband. The girl stood her ground, argued that it was the father's fault in having found a gambler as her husband; she also told them that all she wanted was a place in the house and that she would pay for her keep with a job she would find. And she has kept up her word and he determination. Since then She has worked in NGOs to earn her living and to keep her busy. She reads a lot,she is never depressed, has a positive outlook on life and never says "Why me?'
As for the husband, he is shamelessly fighting for restitution of conjugal rights, refusing to give her a consensual divorce for after all the great indian marriage laws do not allow a woman to seek a divorce on the ground of a husband being a gambler or alcoholic or liar. For six years now she has been married in law without being entitled to any of the priveleges of a marriage. She is punished for just taking the seven steps with him around fire while he is not hauled up for not sticking to the mantras he said while taking those steps!! The case goes on...
But she accepts it all in the right spirit for she knows she is right and that is what real heros are all about.
5 Responses
  1. Anonymous Says:

    Sheesh ! Tell her if you can that we give her a thumbs up and all our respect.

  2. Pradeep Nair Says:
    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  3. Pradeep Nair Says:

    What needs to be admired is her refusal to be cynical in the face of adversity.

  4. Shashi Iyer Says:

    i admire her for this one reason: she knows what she wants and will not settle for anything less. i wish we had more people like her to inspire us...

  5. Unknown Says:

    Very sad but unfortunately its not uncommon. Hats off to her for standing her ground